Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Romania II

When I think of Romania, I think of her...

Romania II – Mihaela

I went looking for her today-
That brown girl,
With those brown eyes,
And crazy high cheekbones.

And I found her-
Hair matted and dirty,
Eyes still brown and sparkling.
She ran to me
And into my arms
And we held one another
For a long time.

I asked if she was going to school-
And she said yes.
I looked into her eyes deep-
And she said no.
At 9, she stays home to care for
Younger siblings-
So her twin brother can go to school,
So her mom can work at the town dump,
Sorting trash, in her colorful skirts,
So her father can hang out, chewing sunflower seeds.

As I smoothed her hair,
I told her we were leaving.
She asked why,
But her brother ran up and
She forgot the question.
I was relieved
Because sometimes I just don’t know the answer anymore.

She ran to grab her toddler sister
Who was coming frighteningly close
To the horse that was kept in the
Tiny cement courtyard.
And I let her go.

When she returned,
I said good-bye, kissed her forehead
And said: I love you, take care of yourself.
I left, hiding my sobs
Wanting to take her with me,
Wanting to rescue her,
Knowing that no matter how well I spoke Romanian,
No matter how well I tutored her-
It wouldn’t matter.
Short of abduction,
There will be no rescue.

And hidden in my sobs was this cry:
Rescue her.
Abduct her heart,
Speak softly her name,
Until she recognizes the voice of Love
And hides in its salvation.

These words are truly imperfect as I continue to feel so raw over what has been left behind...


Brian Miller said...

beautiful...i have 3 littlekids in the hills of KY i feel much the same about from a mission i did...i carry their pics in my bible to remind me...

jo said...

such sweet words. prayerfully today she remembers your love and knows His.

Misty said...

oh, my heart aches at this post. i'm so glad you linked w/ emily b/cs as soon as i saw romania, i had to come over. i spent two summers in iasi, and the country has never left my heart. i see mihaela's brown eyes in the eyes of my friend irys or elena, and their father adi. i miss romania. i love your heart for these children, and trusting in their Father to abduct their hearts. yes, please, lord.

alittlebitograce said...

my sponsored child lives in romania. it is hard (and heartbreaking) to understand the realities of his life, his house burned down and his family living in one room while they slowly rebuild.

thank you for your words that show both heartbreak and beauty and your prayer for this little one.

Melissa Campbell said...

Your love for mihaela is beautiful intercession, so sweet and fragrant before the Lord. He hears your heart cries. He will answer your prayers. He will bring to bloom the seed you planted.

I pray with you today for "the least of these" whose faces shine from Jesus' heart. Blessings to you!

emily wierenga said...

oh april... i've missed you and your posts. my heart aches for this girl. it also aches for you, having to leave, but this is what we must do: trust our loved ones into the hands of One who loves them more. thank you for this beautiful post friend.

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